Uncertainties

There comes a certain point in life where we have to face the facts that our parents are starting to show signs of ailment. My dad has been in and out of the hospital for the past 3 days after 3 weeks of prolonged cough. The x-ray and CT scan showed a tumor the size of an apple lies between his heart and the liver. My siblings and I are now faced with uncertainties, not knowing what is actually the diagnosis.

The treating physician is claiming that this is a rare case. He gathered his panel of experts in his department to look at my dad's case, and the more we are panicking. My dad has to go through a biopsy procedure to collect some tissue sample from the growth. Being in a public hospital, you have to work your way around to get faster diagnosis and results. I had to send the specimen to an external lab and now the results are with me. I can't make heads or tails out of the fax copy sent to me, but from the words "lymphocytic thymoma" - I figured it must have got to do something with cancer. My heart sunk when I read the definitions, but it has yet to be translated by the specialist.

And the appointment is tomorrow. I shy away from thinking about it the whole day today by making myself consumed with work that has been delayed for the past few days. When my dad was in the hospital, he kept himself amused by cracking jokes with the nurses and fellow wardmates. He was in the coronary rehabilition ward, and those admitted there a far ailing than he is. But I guess his optimisim is the only way to make himself forget about the tormenting truth planted there in his chest.

I fear going through a sleepless night tonight. As I write this, my eyes are already blurring with tears, unsure of what is coming tomorrow. I am hoping for the best for my dad, the moment of truth when his doctor will translate the lab results...